We’re More Alike Than You Know, Yet Not

messages Jun 19, 2012

Before you think I’m about to make a political statement on my blog, hold tight for a second, because I’m not.  I’m about to make a human statement about something that affects my health, my wellness, my resiliency and my performance.

Do you feel like you know me as a person or have a pretty good idea who I am – as a woman and a mother?

Do you feel that I’m a danger to society or your family?

I don’t think I’m being too self-centered by saying that I’m a caring person of integrity who takes her role as a person and a mother very seriously.  By all accounts anyone would tell you my daughter is a very happy, creative, intelligent, well adjusted, caring girl.  I am the legal guardian for two different family’s children and have been asked by many other friends to be the legal guardians for their children.  I think it’s safe for me to say I’m a good mom.

I also have a loving, committed, respectful, and supportive relationship with my partner Tiffany.  We are two responsible, caring people who are more like you than you know.  We’re ridiculously normal.  We want the same things for our lives and families you do.

Unfortunately, it’s hard for us to have the same things as you.

Did you know that if I was in the hospital, the staff could deny Tiffany the right to even enter my room to visit me or make any decisions for me?  Could you ever imagine being denied the right to visit your husband or wife?

Did you know that we have to pay more for health insurance?  Many people think it’s great that companies offer health insurance to same sex couples, but it’s not, because we have to pay more than heterosexual couples.  Could you imagine a company making you pay more for marrying the person you did?

Could you ever imagine another person or political group voting on whether or not you could marry the person of your choice?

This is why I’m saying this is a human issue, not a political one.  These things are basic human rights I am not entitled to.

Do you find it fair that I’m a loving, caring, responsible person who loves someone for who they are; yet I can’t have the things you have?

I could go on and on listing the 512 basic rights you have that I don’t.  That’s right: 512 rights I don’t have even though I pay taxes….to a government that doesn’t acknowledge the existence of my relationship.

My parents don’t agree with the choices I’ve made as it pertains to my personal relationships, but they still support me and can’t help but love my partner anyway.  They have different political views, but understand I shouldn’t be denied basic human rights.

If you live in a state where same sex marriage is up for vote, please vote for all humans to have the same basic rights.  Please ask your friends and family to vote for people like me to enjoy the same basic human privileges they do.  My love for another person is not a danger to you or your values.  My taking care of my family does not affect your ability to take care of your family.

It’s Pride this week here in Minneapolis.

I’m proud of my partner and 12-year-old daughter.

I’m proud of my family.

I’m proud of who I am and the choicest I’ve made in life.

And I simply want the opportunity to make all the choices you get to make.

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